The Bequest

I still can't figure out why Eddy just... ran like that. Some people don't like social media. I get it. It's exhausting and most of it's fake, but it's not all bad. At least if he told me what bothered him, we could talk about it. But he didn't even explain what upset him.

Eddy just left.

He must not really have liked me much if something like that scared him off entirely.

Even after a day of shopping (not very good shopping, but still, shopping) and pedicures, after going out to eat and getting dessert, I'm still bummed.

Today, thanks to the internet, I've hidden in my room, bingeing romantic comedies. After watching 'Someone Like You', I just can't watch anymore. Who would be so stupid not to want Hugh Jackman from the get-go? Ugh.

I finally force myself to shower and get ready for the day. No one has ever felt great after wallowing in their own filth for two days. I refuse to let stupid, smart, sexy Eddy ruin my entire summer. He may be a jerk, but that's fine. I'm proof against jerks, after all this time. Immune. Unaffected. I am Switzerland.

Actually, that may be more about war or something. I can't remember. But then, I'm Swiss chocolate. Delicious in every circumstance.

I really need to get out of the house.

"Mom," Emery says. "Hey."

Oh, no. My kids are surprised that I've emerged from my room. That's a very bad sign. "I'm going for a walk. Anyone want to come?" "We just got back inside from playing with the goats," Maren says.

I almost pass out. Maren, playing with goats? "Wait, you did?"

She shrugs. "They're cuter than I thought."

I may die of shock. "Okay."

"Actually, I was thinking about it, and maybe I could take horseback lessons, too. I mean, if everyone else can ride, it wouldn't hurt for me to learn."

Words cannot form properly, and I find myself spluttering. "You-horseback? You?"

"Very funny," she says. "Well, if you think about it and don't think it's a good idea, that's fine. Whatever."

"No," I say. "Emery's loving it, and we have like a dozen horses here, so that's fine."

She smiles an honest-to-goodness, real smile.

Once I get outside, and I start walking, I feel even better. I can't let my entire life focus on just one thing. It's not healthy. I head for the 'office' out of habit. It's covered with bright yellow flowers, now, and butterflies flit from one to the other. A few bees buzz too, but I avoid them.

When my phone rings, it's actually a little jarring. I swipe talk just to get it to stop making that awful bleating sound. "Hello?"

"Amanda?"

"Heather?"

"I'm calling on an official office line, with my boss, Victoria Davis, on speakerphone with me."

"Okay."

"We wanted to formally notify you that you've been selected as one of Lololime's newest brand sponsors."

The bees keep buzzing and the butterflies keep bobbing around, as though nothing has changed, but I can hardly believe what I'm hearing. "You are? I mean, I have?" I shake my head to try and get my thoughts unjumbled. "That's wonderful news. Thank you so much!"

"It's nice to hear your voice, Amanda," a woman, whom I presume is Mrs. Davis, says. "I can't wait to meet you in person. When will you be returning to New York?"

"My daughter Maren has a cheer camp the two weeks before school starts. Our plan is to head back home the very beginning of August."

If you're loving the book, nel5s.com is where the adventure continues. Join us for the complete experience all for free. The next chapter is eagerly waiting for you! "We've loved seeing all the fun, small town posts. I hope you can try to make plans to return next summer. Or if not there, to vacation somewhere similar."

"I'm sure we can work something out," Heather says. "Amanda has been very receptive to all my suggestions."

"That's wonderful to hear," Mrs. Davis says. "I'll look forward to chatting with you. Legal's sending the contract over sometime today."

When I hang up, I expect to uncontrollably dance all over. I figure I'll sing and leap and shout.

But I don't.

I mean, it's nice that I'll have consistent money. I can stop taking almost every opportunity to push things that are on brand and only promote products I love, but otherwise...I don't really care. For the last few months, from the time they emailed to let me know that I was on the list of people being considered for a brand sponsor spot, I've almost obsessed about it. And now that I've won-my life hasn't really changed much. It moves along, much as it ever did.

I'm actually more delighted that Maren wants to do an outdoor activity with her cousins and sister than I am that I will now be gushing more often about Lololime than anything else. In my distraction, I've walked nearly back to the house. Bizarrely, there's a strange car there. I wonder who might be visiting. It can't be Eddy or Steve I know their trucks. And it's not Eddy's work SUV, either.

Maybe it's a friend of Abigail's?

I've nearly reached it when I realize there's someone sitting inside. The driver door opens and the man turns around. It is Eddy.

"What are you doing here?" I don't even think before I speak. I really should try doing that at some point.

He nods his head slowly. "I deserve that."

"I'm sorry," I say. "It's been a long couple of days." When his shoulders slump, I'm quick to clarify. "Not because of you-work stuff." What a lie. Work is going better than ever, with the exception of the number of comments demanding more of the hot cowboy.

Oh, no, what if he's gotten on and seen those? How embarrassing. Is that why he's here? Does he want me to take those photos down?

"Can we talk?" He gestures back at the car. "All I had this afternoon were some vaccinations and a few blood draws. My sister's going to do them for me, which is why I have her car. I thought we could, I don't know, go somewhere and chat." I should tell him no. I should send him packing. I'd feel better, probably. But the part of me that's been licking the wound over and over since he ditched me and peeled out down the driveway wants to know what he has to say. Okay, all of me wants to know. That desire's even stronger than my hurt pride. "Sure." I circle around and climb into the passenger side.

His sister's car has a fuzzy steering wheel cover. Someone painted a landscape on the dashboard, and it's actually quite good. And there are little dreamcatchers hanging on the rearview mirror, the backs of the headrests, and on the door handles. "This car is "

"I know. Believe me, I know."

"Where are we going?"

He shrugs. "I'm too ashamed to take you to the Gorge again."

"Did I do something embarrassing there?"

His head whips toward me. "No. I did. I mean, not there, but right after."

I put my hand on his, bracing myself for the possibility that he might yank it away. But he doesn't. "Eddy, I'm not angry. I thought you were mad at me for posting those photos without getting your permission."

Now he pulls his hand away. "Maybe the Gorge, then. This might be easier with food to pick at."

He doesn't speak on the way, and I don't press. I know he's upset, and I know that things between us are...confusing, but I'm just relieved it wasn't my fault. I know that's stupid. I should have more self-esteem than that, but it's not like Paul built me up. The intervening years haven't really done a good job of reversing my underlying feelings of inferiority, either. The luck I've had, the career I've built, it's all been just that. Serendipity. Unsustainable, unexplainable, subject to whims outside of my control. People could, at any time, realize that I'm not sophisticated or talented or intelligent... or even very pretty.

When we finally reach the Gorge, Eddy jumps out of the car and runs around to open my door. I doubt it's child safety locked, but I'm not going to stress him out any more than he already is. "Thank you."

His half smile looks...ashamed, like he said. But what could he have to be embarrassed of? He's smart, successful, and he's very, very good-looking. He must know that, at least.